Every day we are presented with hundreds of choices.
Some are as simple as:
What will I eat for breakfast?
Which dress will I wear?
What will I watch on TV?
Others are more complex:
How should I discipline my child?
Should I accept this new job even though it will mean additional time away from my family?
Should I have the surgery or manage the pain?
Yet other choices have the potential to forever alter our lives and the lives of others, positively or negatively:
It’s just a harmless text. My husband will never know. What will it hurt?
Will I drink, then drive?
Will I heed the call and go on this mission trip?
Bottom line is the choices we make every day can make or break us. And let me just tell you guys, I’ve made the WORST choices in some instances, and the BEST choices in others.
In our youth, sometimes we make extremely poor choices due to immaturity and we see ourselves as invincible. Nevermind the time I was barely 16, went to a popular night/dance club in Bossier with friends, told the bouncer I was 18, had left my purse and ID at home, and he totally LET. ME. IN! I could barely enjoy myself because I was terrified my parents would find out and end my life! Oh, and I totally went to church the next day! *sigh* Sneaking into a club, underage, was a BAD CHOICE. Luckily, no other bad choices were made that night, but it DEFINITELY was not a place for a 16 year old to be!
Other times we make small, every day choices that stink momentarily but end up being OK. Think of the time you gave yourself a haircut, or for me, the time I had my Beachwaver turned up too high and BURNED MY HAIR OFF resulting in an unwanted 4”-5” haircut.
But more importantly, we are often faced with BIG decisions, e.g. “bet the farm” opportunities and choices. Even though I still sometimes make POOR choices, with age comes wisdom, and we should be able to greater discern how our choices will impact our lives. And me oh my, how grateful I am for grace and mercy when I do make poor choices.
The power of choice is strong. Here are a few lessons I’ve learned when making choices. (Let it be noted, there are definitely exceptions to some of these. However, these principles have worked extremely well for me when applied prayerfully.)
1. If you have an opportunity to make an immediate choice which will devastate a great number of people, it’s probably not the right choice.
If presented with an opportunity for temporary satisfaction, and the little angel on your shoulder is nudging you NOT to do it, DON’T DO IT. Temporary pleasure is NOT WORTH the long term, harmful ramifications and pain it will bring to you and your loved ones.
2. If your choice will grow and stretch you, it’s probably the right choice.
I am ALWAYS encouraged when I hear of someone investing in themselves. It’s never too late to hire that life coach, further your education, get an additional certification, seek treatment or read that book. In some cases, it will cause a temporary hardship, but in the long run, it will be worth it!
3. If you have a choice, turn the other cheek.
Oooo, this is a HARD one for me! But in all honesty, because I LOATHE controversy, I often times will turn the other cheek. Unfortunately, there are people in this world who THRIVE on controversy and will pick and prod you just for the sake of arguing. Unless it will affect me long term in a negative way, I’ve found it’s SO much easier to disengage, allow the other person to “win,” and move along to the next thing. You can’t please everybody so it’s extremely important to choose ONLY the battles worth fighting.
4. If it takes you deep into debt, it’s probably not the right choice.
I eluded to this in my post Confessions of a Former Things Girl. Just because you can afford the payments on the newest model sports car, or the house of your dreams, doesn’t mean you should buy it. It makes me so sad to see a friend or family trapped in a mountain of debt, only because they bought the lie that things equal happiness. It’s just not true. There is SO much freedom in living below your means and without debt. You may not have the likings of the Joneses, but you will experience a freedom they will possibly never know. There’s nothing like it.
5. It’s NOT the right choice to let circumstances out of your control to define you.
I have a PRECIOUS friend who grew up in unbearable circumstances. She was born into poverty to a teenage mom. Grew up with three other sisters who each have a different father. Had barely any food to eat, and gnawed her mother’s leftover chicken bones to get ANY type of nourishment. Was in and out of the foster care system for several years. STATISTICALLY, she should have ended up the same way, e.g. teenage mom, limited education, living in poverty, etc. No one would have blamed her; lack and dysfunction was all she knew. HOWEVER, she CHOSE to NOT let her circumstances define her. She graduated high school, graduated college, married a Godly, Christian man, had two amazing sons, has steadily worked her way up the career ladder, and consistently pours into others. (She did these things ALL in this order.) While her life is not perfect today, she CHOSE to break the mold and not allow her circumstances to define her. I want to bottle her up and sell what she has to the millions of others in a similar situation. Don’t talk to me about generational curses; you have the choice to break the curse.
6. It’s always the right choice to forgive.
I have to preach to the choir with this one. After I was forced into a new life due to circumstances beyond my control, I was initially, understandably, angry. I held onto unforgiveness for quite a long time. I was bitter and wanted my ex-husband to feel every ounce of pain he caused me. A wise friend counseled me shortly after my divorce was final. She said I would never find joy if I held onto the bitterness. And you know what? Slowly, but surely, my heart began to heal, and my new life set in. Around the same time I listened to a sermon preached by Craig Groeschel around the topic of forgiveness. He encouraged me to do the impossible; to pray FAVOR over my trespassers. And I was like, “Wha?!?” And he kept saying it! And I was like, “NO WAY!” But you know what, I felt the Holy Spirit enter my prayer time and that’s exactly what I began to do. Forgiveness did not happen overnight. It was a LONG process, but I am free…free of anger and bitterness. Have I forgotten? NO WAY and that is a post for another day.
7. It’s always the right choice to love.
There is SO much heartache in our world right now and it’s so, so easy to become numb to injustices or filled with hate for those who have differing beliefs or ideologies from us. Why can’t we all just agree to disagree and leave it at that? Jesus said to love one another. Period. No exceptions.
Life is a series of choices. We all have made bad ones AND good ones. Every bad choice I’ve made gleans a valuable lesson and I apply it to future decisions. Don’t let your bad choices be made in vain. Learn and grow from them! I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below. Is there anything you can add to this list? Any choices you’ve made, regretted, but learned from?
Phillip (Sara's Dad) says
I really enjoy knowing that my baby girl writes all of these notes of encouragement. I hope everyone who tells me how much they mean are also telling you.
Simply Sara says
Awwww thank you so much!!! Love love love you! <3